Josephine Havlak, Photographer... The key for a bar or bat mitzvah is to have a �facilitator� who can encourage the kids to be outgoing and break out of their shells, which can be hard for 13-year-olds. I covered one party where they brought in a woman from a professional dance troupe in Chicago and she was amazing at getting the kids out on the dance floor. By the end of the night, one boy, who initially was terrified to dance, was doing Michael Jackson moves!