I know I sound like a broken record when I talk about the lack or originality in Hollywood, but prepare to be amazed. Lately, they aren’t even remaking movies, they’re just re-releasing them in 3D. Anyway, I hope you have plans for July, because you’re not going to be spending next month at the movies.
Independence Day 3D
Remember that Will Smith alien invasion movie from the ’90s? Well, it’s back.
The Lone Ranger
Armie Hammer stars as the not-so-lone ranger with Johnny Depp as Tonto. Remember the TV show from the ’60s? Well, it’s back. The Lone Ranger rides again…and again.
Despicable Me 2
Remember the adorable animated Steve Carell comedy?
I’m just going to quote the imdb.com description so I don’t screw it up. “When an alien attack threatens the earth’s existence, giant robots piloted by humans are deployed to fight off the menace.” So, if you missed Battleship…
Grown Ups 2
Just when you think Hollywood can’t get any shallower, they let a little more water out of the pool…
Jurassic Park 3D
OK, I have to admit, if there’s a movie that would be cool to see in 3D, it’s Jurassic Park, but still.
An animated tale of a snail who dreams of becoming the fastest snail in the world. No comment.
Phineas and Ferb
I guess if your TV screen is too small, you might want to watch this in theaters.
See what they did there? They put a ‘The’ in front of the word Wolverine in the title. That way you will think it’s an original movie.
The Smurfs 2
If you need me, I’ll be out on a ledge.