Unreliable and second-hand gossip from around the world*

Demi Moore

After more than a year of separation, her much younger husband, Ashton Kutcher, finally filed for divorce. In an attempt to clear her head and escape the prying paparazzi, Demi flew to a Mexican resort for bikini bootcamp. We're told what started as a week of healthy eating and exercise quickly turned into sex-fueled free-for-all with several 20-something cabana boys. It’s a true testament to what a classic beauty she is, because those boys were zygotes when her movies came out.

Taylor Swift

The unlucky-in-love pop star has once again called it quits on a romance. She and One Direction singer Harry Styles parted ways last week, in yet another of what seems like an endless stream of failed relationships. To recap: Once again, Taylor has had her fragile heart broken by a rich, handsome, talented, charismatic guy, and she is alone in the world. The silver lining? She has material for new songs. It’s getting to be a pattern with her: break up, platinum album, break up, platinum album…hmmm.

Kelly Clarkson

The American Idol sweetheart has a new project in the works. She is producing and performing a gangsta-rap video. Clarkson is joined in the I’m a Thug Fo' Life video by Les Mis veteran Hugh Jackman and Call Me Maybe pop singer Carly Rae Jepson. The scene with the minivan ride to the tennis lesson at the country club should be particularly intense.

No Pants Subway Ride

It’s becoming an annual tradition in New York City: Strap-hangers are celebrating…um, their artistic freedom by commuting without pants. This year, the event took place Jan. 13, and passengers embraced the pant-less train ride with gusto. Now, if they can just figure out a way to get them to wear pants the other 364 days, they’d really have something.

*so don’t quote me.